Life in Amurrrrrrica

I just realized that I only post when I'm bored or when I have something really exciting to talk about, aka experiences in foreign cities, and today is no exception. Unfortunately (or maybe not so unfortunately, because, hey, that Disney prince blog wasn't too shabby, right?) today falls on the monotonous end of the blog inspiration scale. My boss at my new job got me to come in on Friday under the pretext of giving me responsibility, namely, by "allowing" me to man the office by myself for the first time.

I'm working as a receptionist and hostess for this firm that facilitates focus groups for market research firms, blah blah blah basically it all boils down to a shit ton of free food. Rich dudes and dudettes come in to observe focus groups, which is apparently very hard work because they order more food than anyone could ever possibly consume in a sitting from expensive restaurants. When it's time to clean it all up, that's when my coworkers and I make our move. Last night for dinner I had lamb kabob, the night before it was shrimp tempura and the night before that I believe I enjoyed a lovely chicken costoletta from the Cheesecake Factory, but I could be wrong; it all starts to get a bit hazy amid the bountiful feasting.

We only had one focus group today, but they needed someone here 9-5 to answer phones. Which means bring in the new girl and tell her she's going to be "in charge, all day, by yourself." Yes, I feel a bit duped, but, hey, more free food for me. And after all the big shots left I took my shoes off and spent a solid half hour doing that thing where when you wear tights you run and slide for a couple feet on the linoleum floor in the kitchen. I answered one phone call, ate a sandwich I didn't pay for, felt it was the responsible and informed thing to do to read some CNN articles on MONEY MELTDOWN '08, but ended up feeling paranoid and confused and finding my way to this much more cheerful site: menwholooklikeoldlesbians.com. Which proved to be thoroughly entertaining for about 40 minutes. I'll probably wind this exciting day down with some homework in this last hour or so.*

In my exploration of FISCAL FIZZLE '08, the article I found most interesting and in which I had the highest level of personal idenfication was one that noted the parallels between our current situation and the fiduciary circumstances of the Ingalls family in Laura Ingalls Wilder's classic novel The Long Winter. This led me to wonder what Laura Ingalls Wilder looked like, which led me to a Google image search (about which I was hesitant, due to the time I Google-image-searched Maria Von Trapp and found that she was most definitely NOT the bright blonde ray of sunshine Julie Andrews led me to believe she was), which made me wonder what Almanzo Wilder, Laura's husband, looked like, which led me to this. Which makes me think, "HOT DAMN LAURA WAS ONE LUCKY PRAIRIE BITCH." In my youthful worship of her novels, I often wished I could travel back in time and meet Laura Ingalls; now, I find myself wishing that again, this time so I can say, "Gurrrrrrl! Kudos."

*When I say "homework," what I mean is "looking for more pictures of prairie hotties."